Guessing Robert's Right

All I really needed to know I learned in Kindergarten! I know that you know it is a book title but here it is a statement. Robert Lee Fulghum was right! As much as I hated that book, although I never even cracked it open to see what was inside, it finally hit me today that the shaping of my social life began in those early years! All this insight came to me today because Mark's friend Slaughter is living close to us and for the first time in a long while we got to really enjoy ourselves, enjoying others. So after they both left, I started asking myself why it is that I have a hard time getting to know other people. The answer came to me...kindergarten, first, and second grade shaped my view of relationships. Sure other things helped such as a horrible experience in high school where my friend defriended me because I told her parents she was going to commit suicide, and of course my first major boyfriend broke up with me because I didn't let him be spiritual enough! My First and Second grade years were the worst though. Every week my circle of five friends continuously decided who wasn't in the group, and who was. Every week I had to worry if I was going to be in with them that week. I eventually just cut myself off over the years. When Mark and I got married then we started the state hopping, and found only one or two friends we would keep close. Lots of potential good friends have come and gone. I have lost a lot of those potential friends because I haven't wanted to connect, or get to close!

The resolve now is that I am 37 years old, without a close circle of girlfriends. A circle of friends that I can hang with outside of work. Therefore, the wall is dropping. I am going to try and reach out. I am going to defy Robert Fulghrum! I am excited for our new friendship. I only hope that my new found confidence doesn't scare them away.

I hope and pray that the struggle my kids are having now in their lives doesn't teach them to be scared of letting people in. I pray that they learn this lesson earlier than I did. Life is too short...family is most important, but nothing can take away the joy a friend can bring you!